My Dance Recital Diatribe

I think it is terrific when friends and family support kids in their endeavors.  It means everything in the world to a child to have their loved ones sitting in the audience/bleacher/sidelines cheering them on.  I love seeing moms and dads and grandparents and siblings and even aunts and uncles show up to an event to support a kid they love.

But. I wish people would think it through a bit before they bring young children along.  For some events, having toddlers in tow is great.  I’ve seen little brothers and sister fully enjoy running along soccer fields and volleyball courts.  The action, noise and excitement is everything that a three year old loves.  Even babies are fine at these events.  They may impede their parents’ enjoyment of the game but they rarely bother others too much.

Then there are family events where bringing kids is completely inappropriate and I’m going to say that this applies to most piano/orchestra or vocal performances.  All require quiet audiences and minimal distractions - neither of which you can count on a child under five to provide.  But above and beyond all of these I will contend that dance recitals are not a place for babies.

I went to the Saturday night performance this weekend with my mom.  We found our seats and got comfortable, excited for what was ahead.  Faith has worked for over six months on some of these dances.  She has poured her heart and soul into this one weekend of the year.  We have paid tuition on many classes, bought shoes, tights and leotards.  Our costume bill would make you question my sanity.  On top of all that, we paid $15 a seat to watch the recital ($15 is modest by the way, many studios in our city charge $25) and my mom bought a plane ticket and flew 500 miles.

My family had a lot invested in this night.  Not just in money, but in time, heart and sweat as well.  So it was with great dismay that I watched the family in front of us sit down with their 11 month old and three year old.  I knew that it could not possibly end well.

To be fair, the kids were about as good as you could expect two kids to be sitting in the dark for two hours with loud music watching people they don’t know dance.  But there was a lot of bobbing up and down and moving seats and passing of the baby as she got fussy.  About 3/4 of the way through they had finally had it and their parents decided to take them out.  I’m sure they meant well, but removing kids means collecting toys, gathering the car seat, saying goodbye to grandma and then standing up and moving through the row of seats.

All of this took place during Faith’s best dance which I only got to see a portion of through the moving bodies in front of me.  I very nearly got violent but ultimately decided that would just cause a bigger distraction.  Had I been a parent of one of the seniors performing their solos? I think I could have justifiably smacked somone.

Dance is not like other sports.  When Faith was in soccer, I got to watch her play every week - sometimes more than once.  If I missed a few minutes of a game it was rarely, if ever, a big deal.  But with dance, I have a one shot deal and this family ruined it because they spent $30 on tickets for their little kids instead of using that money for a baby sitter.  Had they left those kids at home, I’m sure they would have enjoyed themselves more, the kids would have enjoyed themselves more and I know I sure would have had a better time. 

There.

Diatribe done.  Thank you for listening.

To finish on a lighter note, here are a couple of pictures.  First, Faith and her best friend Em.  We have to get a picture of the two of them in costume every year so that years from now I can look through them and sob.

We thought the “Men’s Dressing Room” sign was a nice touch.  Don’t worry, on recital weekend it’s all girls, regardless of signs.

And finally, the best moment of the weekend:  Rich’s dancing debut.  He agreed to be in the Father/daughter dance with Faith in a routine that incorporated the chicken dance, the electric slide and the YMCA.  It was meant to be humorous and it was.  In fact, it brought the biggest cheers of the night and tears from my mother-in-law from whom we had managed to keep the whole thing a secret.

Whether they were tears because she was moved or because she laughed so hard she cried I am not sure.

But here’s the picture that proves that with the batting of her eyelashes and a “Pleeeeease Daddy?” Faith can get her dad to to anything.

Yes, It HAS Been A Whole Year Since The Last One

People.

It is Dance Recital Weekend.  The weekend that is all about Faith.

And her stage mom.

It actually kicked off last weekend with a marathon 12 hour dress rehearsal.  Our studio does dress rehearsal and photographs the same day so Faith’s hair and make up had to be perfect last week too.

I tweeted some photos last weekend via Instagram.  This is Faith in the ballet costume that delights my heart.

It is very sparkly.  I have glitter all of the back seat of my car.  Hayden got some of it on the butt of his pants on the way to the movies on Mother’s Day.

We mocked him.

Reader Katie B asked about stage make up the other day because her adorable daughter is in her first recital this year.  Poor Katie B is trying to figure out how to put on the stage make up and not have her precious little girl look like a tart.

Short answer:  not possible.

Katie B you must embrace your inner stage mom.  Feel free to let loose with the liquid eye liner and hoochie-mama lipstick.  Get your full on Toddlers and Tiaras on.

When Faith was little I put blush, mascara and pink lipstick on her.  In those years she was always in some kind of “natural” costume like a fairy or a bumble bee.  I believe Katie B’s daughter is in a mini Wonder Woman costume so I’d go ahead and go darker for that.  I like the liquid eye liner.  It’s a little harder to apply on a squirmy little girl, but you can do a thinner line and it’s more dramatic.

Here are Faith’s eyes when she was six (I hadn’t added her lipstick yet.  That went on just before she hit the stage to avoid having it smeared all over her costume)

You have to admit that the eye liner and mascara make her eyes look huge. 

This year, for the first time, Faith is wearing foundation.  It’s Reagan’s, borrowed without her permission. Hopefully she won’t read this post until Sunday.  My skin is much darker than my girls’ who have their dad’s fair complexion and I didn’t want to buy a whole bottle of foundation for one weekend so I’m pilfering Reagan’s for the occasion.

My biggest excitement for this year’s look though is the hair.  Every other year, we’ve had to change hair along with costumes for different dances which can be a wee bit stressful when you have six minutes between dances.  This year the director did away with all that nonsense and all the big girls have the same hair through the whole recital.  It’s like a gift of time.

I do have to say though that it looks a little better with the ballet costume than the MC Hammer get up.

That costume is just crying out for some big ‘ol bangs and crimped hair don’t you think?

Winter Recital

My kids don't play basketball.

They don't play basketball because I don't like to watch basketball and so I never signed them up.

So there.

I suppose that if one of them had begged me to sign them up for basketball, I would have done so but I certainly never suggested it and they seem to be developing fairly normally so I think we're good.

What I do like are equestrian shows, soccer, and volleyball so they've done all of those.

Hayden also played baeseball because I thought I liked baseball, but after sitting in the stands through a few 100 plus degree games each summer I was fairly delighted when he decided to hang up his bat and glove for good.

Although I have to say - he was pretty adorable in his uniform.

Of all the things I like to watch, I like to watch dance the most.  Probably because it doesn't involve weather or whistles.  There are no bad calls from referees, loud gyms, dirt or horse poop.

Instead there are theater seats, costumes, music and make up.  What's not to love? (Hayden actually has a pretty long list in answer to that question.)  So I was delighted when Faith's dance studio added a winter recital this year.  Her studio director believes dance is an art, not a sport, so her dancers don't do competitions.  I already appreciated that theory, but after watching a few episodes of Dance Moms I am doubly convinced that this is the way to go. The downside though is that without competitive events, we really only had one opportunity a year to see Faith perform which is not enough for this mama.

I truly appreciated the extra opportunity this year to watch my girl in her element.

 

I know she's getting too old for me to call her cute but . . . 

. . .isn't she????

Big

We are going to Faith's middle school meeting tonight and then 5th grade graduation is Friday. 

When my oldest started middle school I was scared.  When the second started, I was resigned.

With my baby?

I'm sad.

This is the end of an era.  I no longer have little kids.  I truly loved the elementary school years and will be sorry to see them go.

Watch the years fly by in dance photos.

This is Faith in 2007.

And in 2008.

Her bestest friend Em, who is a year older, takes a photo with her every year.

For many years, they and their friends would play Polly Pockets backstage between dances.  These girls have been Faith's friends since 1st grade.

Backstage this year they just talked, ate junk food and read teen magazines.

And Faith took the pictures herself.

As for Faith and Em?

They just aren't little anymore.

I know that by the time she graduates, I'll look at this picture and think she looks small.

But compared to this tiny sprite?

Well, it's clear that she's a big kid now.

Dress Rehearsal 2012

This year's theme:  Broadway Bound!

(I apologize for poor picture quality.  I can't figure out how to get good shots in a darkened theater but couldn't resist posting action photos.)

HipHop to "Mama Mia" from Mama Mia

Company/Combo to"Ease On Down The Road" from The Wiz.

Ballet to "Mama I'm A Big Girl Now" from Hairspray.

Back row, left.

Sigh.

Isn't she just the cutest?

I do love costumes so.